April 19, 2007

Losing weight, losing my job, and losing my mind....

Well that sounds ominous doesn't it so let's start with the good things and then we will end on a low note. Or better yet let's get the bad out of the way...we just found out that our site is being closed and as of November 1, 2007 I will be unemployed. Now I get a really nice severance package (which sounds bad because severance means to have something severed or cut off yuck) which will keep money coming until about April 08 but we have some options which might mean another move this time to the Big D(Dallas for all of you Yankees) but at least one would mean us staying here and me working for another company here in town. Your prayers and cash donations would be apprecaited. Please send them to my work address so that Kristena doesn't know I have money (oops forgot she is sitting next to me).

On to better thoughts.....As I mentioned a few blogs ago it is time for me to downsize. So I began this process almost a month ago as I was afraid that the county was going to start measure and tax me as a house. So after 30 days of diet and exercise I have lost a whopping 38 pounds. Now not to diminsh my accomplishment but in an effort to frame this in the proper context 38 lbs. to me is like taking a bucket of sand off of the beach. There is still plenty more where that came from. However, I am quite excited that I can see my shoe laces again and at times the tops of my big toes. I am hoping at some point to be able to scratch my ankle without having to take a deep breath and hold it while I bend over. I passed out the last time I scratched my ankle and it was pretty embarrassing.

As I mentioned above I have been going to the gym again. As we now have three kids and I love to see them in the morning when they get up I am not going in the morning but instead during my lunch hour at work. If you have been keeping up on my blog you will know that I have had several interesting experiences at the local YMCA and recently I had another. I went to the gym and had a great, sweaty workout and when I sweat it sometimes smells like when you are trapped behind the pig truck on the way to the farm I needed to take a shower before returning to work. So I pulled my gym bag out of the locker only to discover that I forgot a towel. Well being the resourceful lad I am and also taking into account that no other men were at the gym I thought I would use the paper towels in the locker room. You are thinking man quick thinking big man....well it was I great idea except this towel dispenser has a sensor that only allows a sheet to come out one at a time. Now assuming that I am almost 6 feet tall and in spots almost that wide that is a lot of paper towel. So how many waves of my hand over the sensor do you think it took in order to get enough paper towels to dry off. Let's just say....that I am lucky that due to my high fat content and the fact that everything jiggles when I move the sensor picked that up so it only took about 10 minutes to get enough paper towel to sufficently dry me off. The moral of the story is....well there isn't one just don't forget your towel when you got to the gym.

Well baby Lauren is doing great and looking more like her mommy everyday. She is still as perfect as the last time. The big kids (as we are now calling them as we often can't remember their names) are getting quite excited about the arrival of their new outdoor playset. We have invested one of their college funds in this item so they better love it. Well we will post again soon. Love to all.......

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi! Great blog.Ha,Ha. This would be a great story to tell at the reunion. We would all laugh ourselfs silly. Glad you are working on getting and staying healthy.Grandpa wants to lose weight. Grandma is going to half to start helping him, by how I cook, I guess.I'm anious to see the kids. And see how much they have grown. Love to you all. grandma

Anonymous said...

Well, I needed that laugh. The sensor thing is annoying. I was in the county building and decided to take a pit stop (bathroom break) and when I stood up the toilet flushed I jumped at least a half inch wondering if someone was able to get in the stall with me. Electronics are not good for failing hearts and fat people. As always you will talk your way into a new position with a big raise attached. The big D could stand for Danville Ohio, Delaware, Ohio,
somewhere a little closer to home. If you do move a mother in law suite would be a good thing.

Love mom

Kim said...

You are too funny for words...Maybe this whole passing out thing I have been having is from this extra weight and trying to tie my shoes, TIME FOR AUNT JUDY SLIP-ONS. Maybe the fact that my knees hurt is because I have extra weight and not because I inherited bad knees...AND MAYBE the reason that my pants split out in the back was because the pressure from the fat pushed up against them made them weak at the seams and not because of a small hole somewhere...which is the story I would like to tell everyone. GYM...I always thought you were talking about going to Jim's house. I don't think we have one here in Ohio...will have to research that. As far as the papertowels...I have been mentally scarred for life, it sucks being a visual person sometimes. Thanks for always making us laugh...I would post funnier stuff on my blog...but the pastors are reading...SO...I don't want them to think I have lost my mind or that family therapy is in order for our family.
Love you...Kim

Anonymous said...

I love reading your blogs! They are hilarious! I'm glad you are going back to the gym and congrats on the 38 lbs of weight loss. Keep up the good work. We miss all of you and are looking forward to coming again (hopefully to take kids to SeaWorld). Keep me posted about the job search. Texas is a lot further than florida but i know that's where ya really want to be. We'd still come for visits. Love to all of you. Give he kids big hugs from us. Grandma, Doug, Nick and Sydney

Anonymous said...

Wow, Congrats on the 38 lb loss!! I sure wish I had 38 off. I am ready to try again though. The knee surgery helped my knee but the weight is still bearing down on every other joint so it is time to do something!! Sorry about the your job!! That stinks! But maybe God has someplace better that he wants you and your family! Keep us posted as to where you land. We will be praying for you to find the perfect job!! I laughed and laughed at the paper towel story. I don't think I could of done that but you guys are a different breed! I could see Jason doing that. You boys are wild and crazy!
Love to all,
Marsha

Kelley said...

Well, that was definitly the morning chuckle I needed! I tried really hard not to visualize! :) That's awesome about your loss. I need to get motivated. Maybe your success will motivate me! Sorry about your job. I agree with your mom though, closer would be better! :) Love you!

Anon said...

hahahahaha

Great writing John. I love reading your posts!

Sad to hear about the job. Happy to hear about the weight. Keep up the good work.